Long Time Since I Blogged

Well it's been a long time since I last blogged so I should blog again.....

First off I have been pretty much at a stand still since I last blogged. Weight really hasn't done much. Gone up a pound or two and then back down a pound or two. This week I am doing better about my exercise but the weight still hasn't been changing. My clothes are still fitting better and I am in a solid 3X for both the pants and the shirts. That's actually a pretty major change when you consider a year ago I was wearing 5X for both shirts and pants and if I hadn't changed anything I was heading for a 6X pretty soon. Even still I want to keep the weight loss going.

When I was on my walk Monday morning I really did thinking and realized that there had been a point where I had stopped working hard at the whole process. I started thinking about why and reflecting back to what has gone on over the last several months. I realized that at some point I had lost the drive myself to lose the weight and started pushing because of not wanting to disappoint everyone else. Sounds silly I am sure but it had become a pressure that I wasn't dealing with very well at all. I was getting lots of praises which are great but somehow that turned into to much praise. I lost sight of why I was working on the weight loss and why I was doing this for "me".

Now I am having to soul search again to get my drive back. Yeah I feel the best I have felt in years. I am fitting into clothes that I haven't fit into for at least 10 years. I do want to be around for a long time. But somehow I still am battling myself for the drive again. I think part of it goes on with the other major stresses that have gone on since I had my surgery and most recently in the last 4 months.

Since surgery I have had two pay cuts and then finally a lay off from work. Why wife's income has dropped in half from a year ago as well. So of course that's been major stress in our lives. The state of the economy has been one that just isn't lending jobs for anyone as we all know all to well. So with those factors in place we have taken my son out of daycare and I am watching him on a daily basis. In addition to this I have gone back to school to work towards my degree. Honestly I don't know if I am going to continue after this term.

All of these stresses along with the weight loss "work" has overwhelmed me. I am not doing as well in school as I should be. My weight loss is at a stand still. I have applied to numerous jobs with "zero" outcome. Hell not even a call for an interview. I am not taking care of the house like I had the first couple of weeks when I was out of work. Sure maybe I am sounding like a cry baby but frankly I don't care. It's all just to much for me to handle which I think is why the weight loss has been put to the side cause I have been so stressed about everything else.

I know there has to be some changes soon in many ways so I can get back on track and get back to living the life I should be living. We're moving at the end of December to Palm City which is only about 20 minutes away but the rent will be cheaper and we'll be in a house. The area we're moving too also has cheaper daycare so hopefully we can get Nicholas back into daycare full time again soon. I have also resigned myself to the fact that I need to start looking for work other then drafting. I don't know what else I can do that is a skilled job but I will find something and hopefully someone will see me as a good person to hire and I can find a decent paying job to provide for my family once again. I will continue my schooling but just not at a full time schedule like I had tried to do this term. Just was to much for me to do with everything else I had going on too.

So there you have it. My blog for the week. Weight loss isn't going well. But it be better soon.

Check Back Tomorrow

Sorry guys. Being that I am sick I forgot to weigh in first thing this morning so I will do it tomorrow morning and report on the week. Now let's hope that I can get past being sick quickly.

Week 40

Hey it's week 40! I didn't lose any this week but good news on that too is that I didn't gain any either. I've come to the conclusion that I need to change up my exercise routine as I think my body has become adjusted to it and so I need to increase my exercise program more. Since this is my third straight week of no weight loss it's time to make more adjustments.

I can still feel a decent amount of restriction even though I do think I am ready for another fill. Often times breakfast is hard to have but I do as my doctor has directed in making sure to have a decent breakfast. Usually an egg with a piece of meat and a glass of water. Of course drinking the water before eating. Lunch's and dinners of course are still pretty much a meat with a vegi. Seems like it has become the daily meal for me.

I have been walking every day but it just doesn't seem to be enough anymore. I am going to go back to using my exercise videos. I just need to figure out where to put it into my daily schedule. I am still going to be taking my morning walk with my son I just have to add in another time to do the video. I will get it figured out.

Ok so the totals for this week haven't changed from last....
Week 40
No gain and No loss
Current Weight - 350 lbs
Loss Since Surgery - 92 lbs (40 weeks)
Total Weight Loss - 135 lbs

Week 38 & Week 39

Well the last two weeks have not gone so well. Last week I was flat with no gain and no loss. This week however I gained 1 pound. I know it has to do with food which I just need to be better with. I also know that I need to go get another fill in my lapband.

The last couple of weeks have been really stressful too with school starting and now I have contract work to do as well. I am dealing with it but I have found myself really wanting sweets lately which I am sure is due to the stress. I have really got to control it but it's been really hard at times.

I am still walking daily with Nicholas. We also go to the pool several days a week which is great.

Ok so anyways over the last 2 weeks a gain of 1 pound :(

Week 38
This week no change
Current Weight - 349 lbs
Loss Since Surgery - 93 lbs (38 weeks)
Total Weight Loss - 136 lbs

Week 39
This week 1 pound gain
Current Weight - 350 lbs
Loss Since Surgery - 92 lbs (39 weeks)
Total Weight Loss - 135 lbs

Week 37 Post Op

Another milestone has been broken! Today I broke 350 and weighed in at 349!! Woot! Happy Dance! So this week I lost 3 pounds. I am very happy with the weightloss and am continuing to work at it.

Nicholas and I go for our walks every morning while Karen get's ready for work. Then we get back to the apartment just a short time before she has to leave and we have play time for a little bit. Then we try and go to the pool or a park a several of days a week. Then in the afternoon we usually go over to the mall for a walk around the mall. He's really helped me keep active during this time of a layoff. I am not sitting around and worrying about being unemployed all the time but instead am keeping active with him.

I did change a major thing in my diet. I noticed that when I had a little larger of a breakfast meal I was wanting to eat more throughout the day. So I reduced the amount I would eat at breakfast and as a result I don't eat as much throughout the day. I am getting fuller on less and wanting to snack less. I think what was happening is I was stretch my stomach out first thing in the morning and thus giving myself the "want" to eat throughout the day. I have seen a dramatic difference since this change.

Ok so here are the totals for this week....
Week 37
This week 3 pounds lost
Current Weight - 349 lbs
Loss Since Surgery - 93 lbs (37 weeks)
Total Weight Loss - 136 lbs

Week 36 Post Op

Well just one pound lost this week. A little disappointing but at least it's a loss. It's been a stressful week with trying to get adjusted to my son being home with me full time and getting my financial aid pushed through at the college. It's been enjoyable having Nicholas home with me yet doesn't give me a whole lot of time for other things. In the mornings we go for a walk. Ranging between 2 to 3 miles just depending on the route we take. Then 3 days a week we're going to the pool a little while after our walk. Then in the afternoons after nap time we have been going to the mall for another walk. It's a mile. So I am trying to keep both him and I fairly active. It's been a good week for us.

I am a little surprised that I lost only 1 pound this week. I think I need to be watching my diet a little closer. I think my food portions are a little big and need to curb that. I also think I need to go back for another fill in my lapband. It doesn't feel as tight as it has been.

Ok so here are the totals for this week...
Week 36
This week 1 pound lost
Current Weight - 352 lbs
Loss Since Surgery - 90 lbs (36 weeks)
Total Weight Loss - 133 lbs

Week 35 Post Op

Well another week has gone by and another 2lbs lost! It's great to keep losing week after week even with a couple of tiny set backs I am still happy about my weight loss. I honestly can't tell you the last time I weighed this "little". It has to be about 8 or 9 years ago now or more.

I still contribute the weight loss to eating better and exercise. The walking greatly helps and makes me feel better as well. The hardest part with being unemployed now is keeping up on a good schedule with walking. I think tho that will get a little easier this next week since starting Monday my boy will be home with me and no longer in daycare. So my plan is to get up in the mornings like usual and get us ready for the day with breakfast and all that. Then at about the time that we would normally leave to go to daycare and me to work I will instead put him in the stroller and go for a good walk. It's still cool enough at that time of the morning that we can enjoy it and not be melting in the humidity. Then after our walk I am thinking we'd go to the pool to cool off especially since he likes the pool so much. Then in the afternoons depending on how things are going I am thinking we'll be making trips over to the mall to take a walk there too with a stop off at the play ground on the way back. Should really help me keep up on my exercise as well as give him plenty of time outdoors playing.

The other thing I have to make sure to keep up with is my diet. I don't want to get lax and start eating bad just cause I am not working. So keeping up with a healthy breakfast. Not snacking through the day and making sure to have a decent lunch is very important. Finally continuing to have a sensible dinner to round out the day.

Sounds like a lot of planning and such but I think it's going to help me mentally through this time which is key to my past eating habits. Something I don't want to fall into again. Not to mention needing to make sure I keep a good schedule for my son. We have found all his life he's very much a schedule person. He knows when he's suppose to eat, when we're suppose to get ready in the mornings, what the nightly routine is etc etc. It's kind of funny but also a pain when we want to do something a little different we have to plan it to make sure he'll be ok to go with the flow. LOL

Ok well back to the weight loss and the totals for the week.....
Week 35
This week 2 pounds lost
Current Weight - 353 lbs
Loss Since Surgery - 89 lbs (35 weeks)
Total Weight Loss - 132 lbs